Saturday, June 14, 2014

Our Shared Pearls

Several weeks ago Dan & I celebrated our 30th anniversary with a trip to O'ahu Hawai'i ... we booked our stay at Disney's Aulani Resort & Spa on the Leeward Coast of the island. It was such an awesome trip!  This was our first "major" trip away from family --- 
just the 2 of us.  

Throughout Aulani are Disney photographers who give guests a photo pass card to use throughout their stay & have the option to purchase pictures at the end of their visit.  And since we had eloped and had no wedding pictures of 30 years ago, we took advantage of the photo pass opportunities. 

As we would chat with photographers we sometimes told "our story" ... 
how we had dated for 8 months, then eloped -- and "now" in Hawaii for our 30th anniversary.  Evidently our story is not "typical" ... 
we would get responses of disbelief, shock and speechless.  
One person asked us if we had any "pearls of wisdom" to share with her since she had "only" been married for 5 years. Dan & I were actually taken aback at that question.  I think that was the first time anyone has ever asked us anything like that.  
{Honestly, we've lost some friends after they find out that we had almost ended our marriage many years ago -- 
so I guess I use the term "friends" very lightly.} 

But we responded with 3 "pearls" ...

Our first pearl is to keep God as center ... we really didn't know if this person has a relationship with God or not, but in our opinion this is the most vital aspect of marriage.  We both will be the first to admit that God has not always been the center of "us".  Sometimes we listened to "counsel" instead of seeking God's truth first ... sometimes we allowed pride to creep in instead of clinging to God's design of marriage ... and sometimes we simply just wanted "my way" -- whether him or me.  But when God became center ... He worked on each of us individually first, then as our married "one" ... everything in our "one life together" was put back into perspective and focus ... with God as center.

Our second pearl is to not take yourself so seriously ... life is too short to always want everything to be "perfect" ... God has so many blessings He truly wants to give each married couple yet sometimes "life" gets in the way. I can speak from my own personal experience on this one as well. I've gotten so frustrated with myself at times when things in life take a turn or a road block or a complete turn around.  Sometimes we just have to give up perfection and just laugh ... even on a bad hair day I can still breathe and enjoy my family & friends.  Life here on earth will never be "perfect" ... but we can lower our blood pressure and anxiety levels by simply accepting ourselves for who we truly are -- 
God's child.

And our third pearl is to never ever give up.  It doesn't matter how dark the clouds may have rolled in ... if it all seems so hopeless ... if you can't find a solution in sight --- Dan & I are living proof to never give up! As I said in my posts
  Once Upon a Time ...     and 
 we thought we had the perfect fairytale marriage ... until less than 4 years we were in divorce court ... all that stood between "til death do us part"  was our final signatures and the final lawyer's payment.  And now ... here we are ... 30 years later. 
 We simply cannot say enough -- never ever give up.  We just cannot imagine what our lives would have been like had we given up.  And again ...

Redemption is beautiful.

Please feel free to comment and leave one (or several) "Pearls of Wisdom" that you would like to share ... we never know what an impact we have on others' lives & even marriages.  There's so many passages of God's Word that tells us how to stand with each other such as 

I Thessalonians 5:11 "Therefore encourage one another and edify one another" ---  

Hebrews 3:13 "But encourage one another daily as long as it is called Today ..."

May you be encouraged in your marriage and your daily relationships through God's Word and 
also through true friends who will always be there 
alongside of you.


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